31 August 2011

Love and Death at a Mariners Game

Monday, I attended a Mariners game. Due to a special offer related to some small book-selling company with which I may or may not exchange my time for their money, I got some pretty decent seats for pretty short money. I will now recap my adventure in list form:

  1. In honor of my favorite former Red Sox player I wore Wily Mo Pena regalia. Who do the Mariners start at DH? Adam Fucking Kennedy. I fucking hate Adam Kennedy.
  2. It's free Mariners towel night brought to you by Sanyo! My need to buy bath towels has been decidedly obviated.
  3. I pay approximately minor league prices and watch baseball from a seat with a nice, clear, unobstructed, if high, view of the entire field. I am able to watch the game without turing my neck in one direction the entire way through. Food for thought.
  4. One of my least favorite former Red Sox players starts for the Angels. Joel Pinero is a loser and always will be.
  5. To the right of me: guy with a laptop. To the left of me: girl way too excited about the wave. Girl two seats to the left readily admits, unprovoked to being more enthused by wave-creating efforts than the game at hand.
  6. Adam Kennedy's favorite song is "Nothin but G Thang". Adam Kennedy is a 35 year old white dude. Adam Kennedy redeemed. Walk up music for his third at-bat features Snoop Dogg.
  7. I ate too much.
  8. I'm not typically one to overvalue the save situation, but fat pre-pubescent girl trying to start the wave, do you have any idea what the leverage index is in this circumstance??
  9. As I'm walking out of the game I hear some dude say "that's a Wily Mo Pena jersey". I shoot back "you're right it is". Seattle redeemed.
  10. Dude had a hot girlfriend. Hot girlfriends for Wily Mo Pena fans? I'm thinking "yes".
  11. Oh the Mariners won.


  1. I have virtually no opinion of Adam Kennedy, but what specifically don't you like about him? Also, "Gin and Juice" would make a hilariously inappropriate walk-up track. Adam Kennedy, please consider this. I actually just looked at his 162-game averages, and he seems to be almost eerily average in almost every category, at least for a second basemen. His caught stealing rate isn't bad, and his average is .272, but he only slugs .385 and his OBP of .326 leaves a little to be desired, so I think I've pinpointed your issue with him: he doesn't take enough walks. If you look at the stats, it's strangely amusing how pedestrian he is, which I guess is why I have almost 0 opinion of him.

  2. -The Mariners were DHing him
    -The Marines were DHing him over Wily Mo Pena
    -The Mariners were DHing him despite having a a .326 OBP and .385 SLG over the last 162 games.
    -The Mariners were DHing him
    -The Mariners were DHing him